Revisiting the Land of God

 

DAY 9

Epilogue as a prologue

The Cohin-Gauhati Express arrived at Chennai Central at 9.35AM,exactly 30 minutes after its scheduled arrival. It was to stop here for 25 minutes--so the printout from the timetable said.

Myself & Bhaskar were the first to disembark & ran towards the outlets of AnanthBhavan,a reputed food joint, to buy our lunches & thus deprive ourselves from the meal (or at least what they try to pass on as meals in the Indian rail these days) they serve in the train.

Having finished buying the lunch packets & sweets, Bhaskar set off towards the train while I stood in the queue to get a cup of milk for my son. After all, there were still 10 minutes to go before the train starts again.

With 5 minutes to go, I came back to Platform no.7 & saw with horror my train has left.

There I stood on the platform, with a cup of milk in my hand, not exactly penniless but wearing only a bathroom slipper & a dress that was being worn for the past few days & our train ticket in my pocket.

Fortunately I had a spare little gadget of communication commonly called a cellphone but the battery indicated 2 little bars which did not exactly raised my confidence.

However I called my wife & told her what had happened ( Bhaskar, meanwhile, knew for certain that I missed the train as he himself had to embark on it running.. but he too had his cellphone left in the train when he got down with me & had no way of warning me ..not that his warning would have done me any good).

That there is a thing called "pulling the chain" escaped all of us & I told them I was taking up measures so that they would not get thrown out from train by the TTE as the tickets were with me.

Met the railways officials next & for the next one hour filled up several forms & then went to Southern Railways HQ control room to conclude the official procedures.

It was 11Am & ensuring that they would not be bothered in the train, I set myself to the next task of bringing myself to Calcutta... not an easy task considering it was December end & all tickets were sold 3 months back.

I went to the chief reservation supervisor & tried for a berth in any train & in any class leaving Madras in the next two days on sympathy ground. But the Lady was unperturbed & advised me to buy a sleeper class ticket & apply for emergency quota ... sleeper class because it offered me the best chance of getting it.. but even she was not very optimistic about it and neither was I very keen on travelling thro' the entire Andhra Pradesh & Orissa in winter with the cloths I had on me.

So I called up my wife in the train & asked her to retrieve my friend Selvaraj's number from my other cellphone kept in my bag.

Called Selvaraj next & told him this "damsel  dumbass in distress" story. He asked me to come to his office . I crossed the road, bought a ticket to Mambalam & got into the local train .

Selvaraj called again before I reached Mambalam & asked me not to stop & proceed to Meenambakkam as there was a direct Indigo flight at 1.35PM to Calcutta & another Kingfisher one via Banglore at 1430 hrs. He said he'd book the ticket if I can make the 1335hrs flight in time & inform me the magic number upon uttering of which the airport people will get me a printout.

So I again got down at Guindy to buy another ticket to Trisulam ( next to meenambakkam as per the direction of Selvaraj and with my luck I was not willing to take a chance to travel without a valid railway ticket).

Got down at Trisulam & as Selvaraj kept giving me direction over phone, I ran towards the airport with my cellphone pressed against my ears ( seen many such scenes in Hollywood movies). Made to Indigo counter in time. Two dumbasses sat there who didn't know how to key in the PCs before them. After much heated discussion they gave me the ticket for Rs.5282/- & asked me to run towards check-in counter & get the boarding pass. Now,WTF is a boarding psss? I already got a ticket, isn't it? Well, later it turned out that the little piece of barcoded paper is the omnipotent stuff that will allow me to get into the flying demon and the ticket is of no use thereafter.

Now, frankly, I hate Airplanes & never been inside any machine that flies. If God wanted us to fly,surely he'd have given us wings. So I was not accustomed with the ways of Airports & I am not ashamed of my ignorance either. So when I found out check-in counter, security people stepped in & after thoroughly observing my dress & appearance, asked for my ID card.

I always believed in God & knew he is specially kind in X-Mas. So when I fished in my pocket I found an ID card. What will you call that except another miracle ? It will probably remain the last miracle unless the communists win the next assembly election in Bengal.( but then the communists do not believe in any single God ..so it had to be a miracle by the blessed demigods of politburo)

So there I stood, before the bewildering eyes of my co passengers, without any luggage or handbags. And then I suddenly remembered that I had not eaten anything since a cup of coffee at Katpadi station early in the morning. So I bought a sandwitch @Rs.50/- & a quick bite forced me to buy another canned pepsi for Rs.70/-(!!!). They sure know how to sell stuff.

So I drank the pepsi & put the half-eaten sandwitch in the wastebasket. There was no sign of any bus or airbus I was not sure what I should do now. Beside the wastebasket stood a few girls with Indigo logo sewn at  strategic position on their dresses. I coughed up enough courage & asked them if flight number 692 had already left. They asked me not to worry & additionally informed me that I was indeed lucky that day as I w'd be travelling with them. Yeah, sure, thank you ladies, that was indeed my lucky day.

Knowing that the airplane has not yet arrived ( yes,for once I had the feeling that I missed it again for the second time that day), I decided to pay a visit to the airport toilet & upon entering the ground floor bathroom, at once I felt at home. Here, at last ,the mask of modern & artificial makeup is absent. The smell & the flooded floor is no different than the urinals of Howrah & Sealdah stations. I breathed a sigh of relief and ammonia.

The Bus came & crammed 160 of us in its small belly & took us to the waiting airbus .

I got down first as I was the last to enter the bus & climbed a decorated ladder. Another checking of boarding pass & voila, at last I was inside an airplane. The airbus has come a long way since the Wright brothers. The fume-like emissions from allover the plane reminded me of some mystic meditation place . However, first thing first.. I needed to find my seat. So once again I asked another pretty lady as to the direction of my seat.It was 2D & after travelling the whole length from the tail section I found..no, not my seat.. but the row no.2.

Now the second problem had to be solved.. there were 3 seats D,E & F. and which one was what? Anyway, nobody boarded the plane before myself & I chose the window seat though I had a suspicion that D is the aisle seat. The suspicion grew as an elderly lady sat on that aisle seat & asked me if D is the window seat or F is the window seat. I replied without hesitation that I sat as per the direction of the air hostess standing over there. The lady didn't say anything more & took out a novel & started reading.

After some mime acting by those indigo babies ( to show how to fasten belts, take oxygen, wear Death-jackets before the plane plunges into the Bay of Bengal etc etc) that would put even Yogesh Dutta to shame, the plane started to move at a leisurely pace.After a long , slow & a bumpy stroll, during which I thought of Meg Ryan in "French Kiss", it stopped. Then taking a long breath it surged forward & its whole body vibrated. I tried to remember the theories of fractrue mechanics & the probability of disintegration when there was no more vibration & a quietness that reminded me of Remarque's All Quiet ...

The plane was airborne & the scenery from the windows were much like a wikimapia page. Now the pretty ladies started to open their shop & coaxed to sell drinks,chocolates, key rings, Jackets, cosmetics & other stuffs in a moving trolley. However, seeing their expressions I gathered that the business was not good. I , having tested the sandwitch at the airport lounge, became wise. Perhaps I should have bargained for a coffee & chips but was not sure if bargaining was allowed while airborne.

The airbus ran (flew?) faster than the pilot anticipated & landed at DumDum airport 30 minutes before schedule.

Got out fast as I had to catch the 1750 Shantipur local. In between I had to recharge the cellphone as I ran out of talktime while I was connected non-stop with Selvaraj.

This is how the day 9 ended for me. Not a very eventful day but not a routine run of the mill day either. But then  a routine run of the mill trip was not exactly in our mind when we planned the trip . But there were anxious moments ,phonecalls& SMSes with Nair,(yeah, the old SR without whose active involvement  I would not have dared to come in he first place),cancellations & confirmations & then one fine morning we met Ashokan,      DAY-1   the driver who came all the way from Cochin, was waiting at varkala station . Took us to hotel Clafouti .

 

They gave us the rooms in the morning itself &

we went off to the beach. The breakfast at Clafouti's restaurant was superb & so was the Hotel.A 2&1/2 hours sea-bath made everyone hungry

& we had our Thai lunch & came to know of the display of sea fish in front of the restaurant every

afternoon/evening. It was quiet a sight.You choose your fish or squid  & tell them how you’d like the preparation & they’ll cook it for you. Normally the cost of most of the fish or squid is Rs.250/- a portion, Prawns/Lobstars costing a bit more. We had squid fry, Tuna in Kerala style curry & Sword-Fish as a tandoor preparation. The next day was

                                              DAY-2

I got up early to have a big cup of coffee alone in the just opened restaurant by the seaside while others were busy packing.

Whenever I go on a trip I find my co-travellers have a hobby of packing & unpacking. They love to pack,take bath,get freshen up ,have rest, search Bengali food before seeing the place they came to see.

Anyway, Bhaskar & Subhada were not so frantic a packer I had seen before & we were only 1 hour behind schedule . Started towards Alleppey at 9am & reached there at about 11.30 . Had breakfast on the way ( kerala style Paratha/Kurma & Dhosa).

Alleppey Boat Jetty (HouseBoats start from here)

Let me tell you about the houseboats. These boats are like floating hotels(1/2/3 bedroom). It consumes about 20 liters of Diesel/hour, runs a generator for a/c during night, have a well equipped kitchen, ( inside the houseboat)

expert cook, awesome attached toilets with every room. The impressive part is that they don’t discharge any of the toilet water into the lake, instead it is stored in a tank & once ina month or so they discharge the contents in a septic tank somewhere on the mainland.The water for bath is stored in an overhead tank ( they don’t use the lake water even for flushing).

 

As for Journey, there is nothing special to write about. It was a memorable experience  but I’d have preferred  a public ferry to see the land & people rather than wandering aimlessly on the great Vembanad lake most of the time.The Boat halted at Pallathuruthy for night stay.By the way, Lunch & Dinner were excellent on the boat.( lunch on board)